Dying To Self

“My son, attend to my words; consent and submit to my sayings. Let them not depart from your sight; keep them in the center of your heart. For they are life to those who find them, healing and health to all their flesh.” (Proverbs 4:20-22)



Dying to Self
“My son, attend to my words;”

Webster’s defines “attend” as to “Be ready for service”. And that is exactly what it is here. God is saying be ready to serve Me, whatever I say. Don’t merely listen. Don’t just meditate, don’t just pray. But BE READY. Be ready for action. Just like Christ was ready to die for our sins. Be ready.

Think of a parking attendant. What do they do? Their job is to wait to be called. He/she is in a perpetual state of being ready to serve. When they are not actually serving they are waiting to be called to serve. Just those two states, nothing else. Jesus served by giving his life away for us. We are called to do the same. Even less than that. Most of us won’t have to die for our faith but the principal is the same. We must die to ourselves. That means putting our ‘agenda’ not only on the side but in the garbage. I don’t mean don’t plan your days or things you need to do. I mean let Him guide and direct you. Follow His way. Dying to self means when things go awry, you are not allowed to get upset. If you get upset at your circumstances you are not agreeing with God. You’re thinking your way is the way it should happen. Obviously, at least in that moment, it’s not the Lord’s way. This is very important. Dying to self shows reverence to God. Shows respect. Shows love. Shows TRUST.
When you make that choice, each and every day, EVERYTHING & I mean everything is vastly different in life, in your eyes.


“…consent and submit to my sayings”

Webster’s defines “consent” as: Voluntary agreement. OK, now here’s the tricky one. Here’s the one that can really get us into trouble. Dying to self is one thing. In other words, we can die to ourselves each and every day which is the will of God. However, when you include the word ‘voluntary’, it adds a whole new dimension that is not as easy as it looks & I think is sorely missed many times. You see, you can get to a point in your walk where you’ve submitted to God’s will for you. But we are asked to do more than just that. We are asked to do it voluntarily. That speaks to our attitude. Too many Christians walk around with no joy, especially in the middle of tough times. They have this ‘martyr’ look on their face. You ask them how they are & you get answers like “As good as can be expected” (when you figure out exactly what that means, please let me know!). It’s almost as if they think a positive attitude is not Christian like. That if they’re happy, they’re not honoring God. Christians are extremely guilty of this. They ‘don’t get their hopes up’ about anything. They are trying to do God’s will & be patient & fight the good fight. The problem is they go around looking like they lost the fight! Or that God’s will for them is bad!!! But the bible tells us numerous times to have a happy attitude, to not complain, to not mope. In stark contrast it tells us to rejoice in our afflictions!

Like I said many of us fall short of that part of the scripture.
Some of this is environmental. When you stop to think about it, our earthly world is SO opposite of God’s world. What I mean is that positive thinking is NOT generally pushed by our modern day society. Oh they talk a good game. Reality shows like Extreme Makeover are positive and inspiring. Oprah & Dr Phil and the like put out this message of doing good & improving from time to time. But overall the media focuses SO much on negative things. Tragedy almost always is the headlines, murder, violence, sex, depravity are all thrown at us at lightening speed in the course of any day. Quick fixes, pills, short cuts, are pushed. It’s so backwards that you see people in beer commercials having a ball. Magazines and radio have people displaying gambling as glamorous & fun. They’re actually trying to put a positive spin on the most negative things in life! I’m not saying never have a drink or go to Atlantic City but you get the picture. As a matter of fact, when there is a town or city in financial trouble, they sometimes suggest bringing in gambling as a positive answer to their problem! And everyone jumps on board like it’s the greatest idea ever! They have votes and really try to push it through. Honestly how good is that for a city?

So if things were different in our world, if positiveness was actually practiced and not just preached by the few, our attitudes would probably be better about this. But for whatever reason, it’s not. So we must be diligent and serious about this.

Think of someone who volunteers for something. If you’ve ever been a volunteer or worked at a place where you interacted with someone volunteering, they are usually cheerful people. They’re the people who are willing to do anything on the project, even the grunt work. They walk in with a smile on theiry face. They’re happy to be there. They are there for different reasons, not for glory, or prestige or pay. As such they usually carry themselves differently, don’t they?

So we MUST be vigilant about this. Friends, realize that we are not being obedient to God if we don’t have a good attitude. And when we meet the Lord, we will have to answer for this just as much as other things. We have to act from a source that knows & believes with all our being that God is working for GOOD in our lives, no matter what the outside says. If we have that believe & practice it day after day, it will be ingrained in us & we will be pleasing to the Lord! What a great goal to shoot for!


“Let them not depart from your sight; keep them in the center of your heart.”

Webster’s defines center as- “thing that is most important or pivotal in relation to an indicated activity, interest, or condition”.

Consider the sun; a big, brilliant, bright star. It has 9 planets (oops I guess it’s 8 now that Pluto’s been demoted!). The planets revolve around it. If the sun didn’t exist who knows what or where the planets may be. It’s pivotal in relation to the planets. It’s the most important relationship to the planets, including our planet Earth. Or take the atom. The must important or pivotal part of an atom is the nucleus. It provides all the power. In the above quote, God is saying to keep His words in the center of our heart.
Webster’s defines heart as – “the essential or most vital part of something”. Our job is to keep God’s word in the most pivotal place of our most vital part of our life. This is very clear. God’s word should be kept as most important in the center of your life. That means your every thought, word, work, deed, action, way, EVERYTHING should be done from His most holy word.

Why? Because

“For they are life to those who find them,”

Webster’s defines life as – “The quality that distinguishes a vital and functional being from a dead body”. I love that definition because it’s so describes how the Lord makes a difference in a person’s life. God’s Word is life. It gives you vitality & function. Without it you are like a walking, talking dead body. For those of you that have the Lord in your life, you know what I mean. If you don’t, I pray you’ll take a step towards Him. He’s dying for a relationship with you. As a matter of fact, He did die for a relationship with you. Yes, I know what you’re thinking and the answer is Yes! Even YOU!!

He’ll give you hope when you have none. Especially when no one around you is giving you hope. He’ll give you confidence and strength when you’re scared and weak. He’ll give you peace in the midst of the storm. He’ll give you endurance when you’re about to give up. When you’re wavering, He’ll give you conviction. When you’re wandering He’ll give you focus. When you’re sad He’ll give you joy. When you’re defeated He’ll give you courage. When you have an ego or are judging others, He’ll give you humility. When you’ve lost your drive He’ll give you motivation. Friends, if you exercise faith and strive to be obedient and follow his Word, he’ll give you glory and victory! That’s God’s promise! That’s the difference. That’s the life that He’s talking about in the scripture above. “For they are life to those who find them,”

“…healing and health to all their flesh.”

Webster’s defines health as: flourishing condition

If you had all the things mentioned above:
Hope
Confidence
Strength
Peace
Joy
Focus
Endurance
Conviction
Courage
Humility
Motivation
Faith

How do you think you’d feel physically? How do you think you’d feel emotionally? What would you go for in life? What would you try, do, be, become? How would your life be different? Just take a moment, close your eyes and picture what your life would look like. What kind of relationships would you have? What kind of friends would you have? What kind of job would you have? How would your relationship with your children and any youngsters or people in you circle of influence be? What kind of example would you be to others?

I’ll tell you what kind. You’d be a walking, talking servant for the Lord Jesus Christ. And people would want to know Him because you found Him and they see such a difference in you! Friends, attend to His words, consent and submit to his sayings. Die to yourself and your ways and be open to His ways and His opportunities. Keep Him close to you in good times and bad. He’s the one who’ll stick to you closer than a brother, no matter what. Because only then, can you truly live. Both here in this life and in the after life with Him giving glory to Him. Praise the Lord!

God Bless You!
To Him be the Glory!

See that man

This is for the wives.
Someone once said perception is reality. No truer words were ever spoken.
So I ask you, what do you see when you look at your man? Do you see someone who is capable, strong, and intelligent? Do see someone whose potential is limitless?
Or do you see someone else? Someone who has limited capacity. Someone who’s made mistakes before, maybe many mistakes. A person who will never ‘get it right’? Do you see that person?


Well, I’m here to tell you that no matter what you see, if it is not positive and hopeful, you are wrong. That’s right. And as long as you continue in this wrongful pattern of thinking the more you’re wrong. You see the bible tells us to not look at what is there. But to look at what can be there! Do you see someone weak? Or do you see someone who is having some challenges at the moment but absolutely has it in him to be strong, to turn things around and never look back? See that man ladies. Not because I tell you it’s there, but because Almighty God tells you it’s there!

Let’s look at a few scenarios.

1-Decision Maker- Do you see a man who has poor judgment? Someone whose instincts are always wrong (in your opinion) and therefore doesn’t make the best decisions in the family. Do you feel that you are better with these things and have to do more than you want in this area? If you didn’t take the bull by the horns it would be a mess. When you look at him, do you see ‘bad decision maker or poor judgment’?

See someone else.
Ladies, this may be very hard to let go of. But I say, allow him to lead the house. The bible says:

“Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord” (Eph 5:22)

Let him lead your family as a whole. Yes, he may make mistakes but if he has your support and trust, I’ll bet he’ll start to make better ones. He’ll know the onus is on him & take it more seriously. But if he feels that you are always questioning his judgment; that if he makes even one decision that didn’t work out, you’ll be there to tell him, this will automatically weaken his judgment for the future. When this happens, many men will start to take a back seat to their wife’s opinion. They feel that if you are going to criticize and question their judgment and decisions, why bother? Let you do it, just to keep peace. Of course, this only makes things worse. It becomes a continuous cycle with you wishing he’d make better decisions but by your demeanor will end up putting more on your own plate. Everyone makes mistakes, so let him make them and learn and gain wisdom from them. Don’t sit there and say “I said xyz would/ not happen”. Even if you say it nicely, men can be extremely fragile at these times. Deep down he knows he should be leading the house. If he makes a poor choice he already feels badly enough.

See someone else.

See someone who is strong, and capable; someone who does have good judgment. See someone who is doing the best they can for you and your family. Let him make the decisions and let him know that you’re in it together and will support him and that you trust that he will get it right. Friends, he’ll rise to the occasion; he’ll rise to the position God has appointed him for. And you will rise to the position God appointed you for too.
Please note that by no means am I suggesting that you be mousy or quiet. We wives have excellent input into all family matters from what school to send their kids to, to what mutual funds to choose. God has given all us of talents and gifts. So our input is crucial! What I’m saying is not to berate him. The truth is he is a person too. You cannot say with 100% certainty that your way will always be right. No one can. I’m saying stop acting like you are smarter than him. You may have some more experience in a particular area than him but that, in no way, gives you permission to put his thoughts and ideas down. Anyway more experience still doesn’t mean that you’re decision is always the right one. Sometimes more experience can cloud our thoughts and judgment due to preconceived notions.

Ladies, if you do this you’ll be shocked at two things. First is how your man will improve in his decision making. Secondly, how much he’ll end up coming to you for your input. You both will learn from each other and appreciate each other more and more. And who doesn’t want more of that in their marriage!

Set that man!


2-Addiction
Do you see a man who has addictions and periodically falls back? Do you see someone weak; someone who doesn’t love you or your family enough to ‘get it right’?

See someone else.
See a person who God has given some tough challenges to. Addictions can be tremendously hard to break. But know that he can overcome. The fact is that many people with addictions have fallen innumerable times but were eventually able to break their addiction for good. So it is possible. Believe that just because he may not have done it today doesn’t mean he’ll never do it. See someone trying the best they can, whose heart is sincere, and who needs your love and support and compassion. Not someone who will kick him when he is already down. Your husband is someone that you can encourage like no other person on the planet can. That’s the effect husbands and wives have on each other. See him as a child of God. No less than you. See hope, not addiction when you look at him from now on even when it’s hard. Believe and make him know, at his core, that you know he can do it.

I must mention that I don’t mean you have to live with someone whom you feel may be a danger to you or your family. If this is the situation, do what’s best for you and your family. That may mean removing your and family from harms way. It may even mean moving out. But you can still do everything else mentioned here. In other words you can still see your man differently.
The bible says:

“Brothers, even if a person is caught in some transgression, you who are spiritual should correct that one in a gentle spirit, looking to yourself, so that you also may not be tempted.” (Gal 6:1)

See that man!


3-Lack of success
Do you see a man who is a ‘failure’? Maybe he’s tried a few ideas, ventures or careers and they haven’t worked. Do you see ‘failure’ or even ‘loser’ when you look at him? Be honest with yourself. Maybe you don’t necessarily call it that in your head but essentially that’s what you have stamped in you mind.

See someone else.
See someone who had the courage to put his money where his mouth is and take a risk. Be proud that he tried. Most people don’t even get half as far as to even try something. Instead, see someone to be admired. Sure, maybe those things didn’t go perfectly, but at least he is not idle and doing nothing. He probably tried his best. Moreover, he probably learned from those experiences important things that he can apply in the future. If you read biographies, you’ll learn that many of the world’s most successful people had many failed business ventures before finding success. Some of them went bankrupt several times! But those so-called ‘failures’ ended up helping them to be a phenomenal success. See someone who needs encouragement. And tell him so! See him as one of those future phenomenal successes!
The bible says:

“To each individual the manifestation of the spirit is given for some benefit.”
(1 Cor 12:7)

Believe that in your heart of hearts and speak it to him. Wives,

See that man!


4-Provider
Do you see a man who is not a good provider? Someone who falls short of bringing in enough money. Someone who is a disappointment to you; a poor example to your children?

See someone else.
This is imperative if you want to be a Godly wife. Ladies, nothing can cut a man’s current and future potential quicker that a wife that sees him as a disappointment. It is such a dark cloud over him that you can almost visibly see it.

On the other hand, a man who feels that he has a woman that loves him no matter what, that supports him and that believes in him 1000% is a man that can change the world, move mountains, even make the world a better place. There is something about his wife that has a direct correlation to his level of ability and confidence and ultimately results.
Most men will only go as far as their woman sees them going.

See someone else.
What does that mean? You must start by seeing him differently. And you must start now because it will not happen over night. See a man who may not be raking in tons of money today but this is just a point in time. Look at the country we live int. This is America and there are opportunities everywhere! See a man who totally has the capacity to grow and make more out of his career. See a man who needs extra encouragement and support. Believe that he can be an excellent provider. Maybe he needs to go to trade school or college. He may have to put in more hours at work to get a promotion or perhaps change careers. Whatever it is for your family, the point is to see him as a partner to work together so you both can advance him for your family’s benefit. This will also help your children, to see how you worked together to get things better for you all!
The bible says:

“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.” (Cor 13:7,8)

See that man!



5-UnGodly
Do you see an ungodly man? A man who is stubborn and won’t ever go to church. A man who is wrong or bad because he has not yet come to the Lord? When you look at him do you see ‘bad’, or ‘not saved’ or some variation of that?

See someone else.
This is one of the most important roles for a wife. This can also be a very dangerous way of perceiving your man. This is because by seeing him this way, it means you are passing judging on him. And if you love God as you say you do and read your bible, you have no excuse to not know that judgment is the Lord’s and the Lord’s alone. You are in no position. I repeat you are in no position.

But instead, God has put you in an excellent position to help. How? By not only seeing someone else, but by being someone else yourself. By being an example. I don’t mean an example of a saint. I mean that many a man has taken his first steps to the Lord by seeing his wife’s example/conduct. Seeing her as a happy, joy filled, compassionate, forgiving, loving, and supportive spouse. This is especially true if your husband isn’t the easiest person to get along with. Friends, if you show this side of you, it’s just a matter of time before he takes notice of your attitude and then gets intrigued enough to ask about it or even join you in going to church.

I must warn you; this may take time, maybe even years. But isn’t his soul worth it? And even if it never happened, there is no way your husband won’t be affected by your commitment to Christ. So see a man who can change in spite of even himself. Never give up hope in him. Pray for him big time. Be kind, compassionate. You never know what is going on in a person’s heart. He may be closer than you think. Gently ask him periodically if he would like to come to church with you or watch a Christian show with you or read something. Back down if he pushes back. Try again when you feel he is in an open minded mood. See a man who can come to the Lord and be saved!
The bible says: “The one who eats must not despise the one who abstains, and the one who abstains must not pass judgment on the one who eats; for God has welcomed him. Who are you to pass judgment on someone else’s servant? Before his own master he stands or falls.” (Rom 14:3,4)

See that man!


5-Lack of effort
Do you see a man that is lazy? Maybe someone who gives you no help whatsoever. Do you see a man that talks a good game, maybe to friends, family, you, even himself, but never ‘gets off his duff’ and actually does anything?

See someone else.
On this issue, I am 100% convinced that this stems from a lack of confidence. It’s not laziness. By nature men are doers, action oriented. If your man is talking and not doing, ask yourself if underlying that is a big lack of confidence which underneath is all, is just plain fear.
This can be a tremendous detriment to a man. Think of it. He knows deep down that even though he may talk about doing this or that, he is not doing. Not walking his talk. And that lack of action just makes him feel even worse, less confident and it becomes a vicious cycle. This cycle must come to an end.

I once heard an extremely successful and well-known man say that it is more important to have confidence than competence. That may sound odd but I believe it’s true. He explained that if a person has confidence but not competence they can always get competent at something. You can always learn something if you want to. But a person, who is competent but lacks confidence, will never succeed because they won’t even try. So realize, first off, that if you are seeing them as lazy, they’re probably seeing themselves as a failure. So as disappointed as you may feel about them, they’re even more disappointed in themselves. So as wives, what do you do with this?

You see someone else.

You see a man who can do anything! Think about the most successful person you know in the area or areas you feel your husband is lacking in. Now begin to believe that your husband can do that too. He can be just as successful as your friend Bob financially or just as abundant as your neighbor Sam health wise. Just by you looking at him differently, without you even saying a word, will be noticed by him. But moreover this is a man that needs a lot of encouragement. He needs you to speak to him, daily maybe, about what he can do, how you see him and your future together. Not in a fake way but if you truly believe it and are speaking and acting in belief, he will begin to get infected with confidence! Support him and tell him how proud you are of him no matter how small an action he takes, especially if he does, or even just tries something new. Moreover, tell him you’re proud to be his wife.
I cannot stress enough that this has to be genuine from you. Do you know that about 70% of all communication is non-verbal? So if you’re saying one thing but your face, your posture, your body are all saying something else, that is what will come through. So start today. This won’t happen overnight but work on it everyday.
Truth is, you will be proud of him! And he already has some qualities that you admire and respect otherwise you wouldn’t have married him. Always focus what he is doing or done, not the opposite. Your future will be bright together. You will go places that you never thought possible.
The bible says:

“Everything should be done for building up.” (1 Cor 14:26)

See that man-victorious!


Please understand something very important. Most men express negative emotions like sadness, frustration, remorse, anxiety, confusion, fear, doubt, hurt disappointment one way, as anger. I’m not talking about verbal or physical abuse. I’m saying they just plain get angry. They yell, they bang things around, they over-react. That’s what most men, not all, do. But ladies, don’t react to that. Ask yourself what is behind the anger. Sometimes it’s frustration or impatience, sometimes anxiety or even sadness believe it or not. You can also try asking him what he is feeling but don’t be upset if you don’t get a true answer. In fact, you probably won’t because they either don’t feel comfortable (yet) to tell you or don’t even know themselves because they usually don’t travel past the anger themselves so they honestly don’t know. But you know this man enough that you can probably figure it out yourself. Don’t take the same old unsuccessful past as before. Change can happen. Your relationship can get better. Remember and remind yourself often that God put you together for a good reason. So if you’re not sure what it is, ask the Lord to show you. And then look for it. Also, when you’re in this situation (and even when not) remember you chose this man. You believed he was good enough to marry. He may not be so wonderful right now but get in touch with those reasons way back of yours and apply them in your approach to a situation and your relationship in general. One of the most disrespectful, disobedient, small-minded and just plain ignorant things a spouse can do is to take pot shots at their spouse in public. To belittle them in front of family, friends is to make yourself look bad, not them.


Just remember:
“Set your mind and keep it set on the higher things.” (Col 3:2)



God Bless You
To Him Be the Glory!

The Straying Factor

In the Old Testament you read the story of the Israelites. You read how Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt, out of oppression, and then eventually how Joshua brought them into the land flowing with milk and honey, Canaan. There they lived, and were blessed by the Lord for many years. However, later you learn that the Israelites, who were God’s chosen people, strayed from the Lord. They got away from worshipping Him, and instead focused on idol worship and earthly things and pursuits. They stayed from the Lord. This is the first time this happened. However, it was not the last. This basic scenario happened numerous times throughout the Old Testament between the Israelites and the Lord. Just in the book of Judges alone it happens 7 times! The cycle goes something like this:

The Israelites are in deep trouble i.e. slavery, war, oppression.
They cry out to the Lord for help.
The Lord hears them and answers their calls.
The Lord saves the Israelites. (Usually in an incredibly awesome and powerful way.)
They are thankful and rejoice and worship the Lord!
But then, at some point in the future, again, they start to stray.
Next thing they know they are in deep trouble i.e. slavery, war, oppression again
And on and on it goes.

One day as I was thinking about this, I realized that people nowadays, myself included, are often guilty of this same basic scenario in our lives. We love the Lord and things are going great. But somehow, at some point in time, we get caught up, forgetful, distracted, lazy in our walk. Essentially we start to stray. Then something happens in our life, or a situation arises and we’re completely at a loss. We cry out to the Lord, just as the Israelites did. The Lord hears our cries and comes to our aid. He may change the situation; he may bring in some help in the form another person. He may give you the extra strength you needed to get through that situation. But however He did it, He still did it. He answered your call. And things are better. We are tremendously grateful and praise the Lord. And then, some time passes and…..well, you know the story! Mind you, this is not to say we go through the same type of hardships that the Israelites did. It was a very different world then. But the cycle is still the same with us thousands of years later.

But here is the thing that perplexed me. The bible tells us that God already knew ahead of time that the Israelites would turn their back on Him! Before He even came to their aid, He knew they would turn on Him who saved them. In Deut 31:16, it says:

“The Lord said to Moses, ‘Soon you will be at rest with your fathers, and then this people will take to rendering wanton worship to the strange gods among whom they will live in the land they are about to enter. They will forsake me and break the covenant which I have made with them.”

Later on in that same chapter it says: “…For I know what they are inclined to do even at the present time, before I have brought them into the land….” Deut 31:21.

That is amazing to me. So then I thought, He made us therefore He knew our strengths and weaknesses. And that brought me to the real question: Why would God create us that way?

Think about it. There’s God; He could create any creature He wanted. He formed us in His image. Why would He put this tendency to ‘forget’ or to stray from Him in us? I know this is part of Him giving us free will. But even with that, no matter how much we love the Lord, most of us tend to periodically move away from Him. I understood why we do it but what I didn’t understand was why God would create us like this? Especially since it is a way to ‘offend’ Him! Why not put a 100% devotion to Him who created us? If you or I were an inventor of some kind, would we create something like this on purpose? I don’t think I would!

But there must be a reason because God did put this in us and after all He’s God. He doesn’t make mistakes. So I meditated on this question and I asked for wisdom from the Lord. I felt I received an answer.

Yes, God created us exactly as we are. He is our creator and Father. He’s our loving, supporting, nurturing, patient and all powerful Heavenly Father. We are His children. All parents want to be with their children. But there comes a time that children want to be away from their parent(s). They want to be independent and ‘in control’. That is fine and natural in our world. But we tend to do this with our relationship with God.

However when we do move away from the Lord, our life changes, and for the worse. We start to hit hardships, experience bad relationships, struggles, difficulties and experience emptiness. Our life seems to get harder. But the real problem is that we are not equipped when these times hit. Because we have strayed from the Lord we don’t have the stuff we need to weather these storms and situations. Our straying causes us to experience these things.

And I’m not just talking about the big problems in life. Even the little minor annoyances or inconveniences of the day can really get to us when we’re away from God. For example, let’s say you are out having lunch with a friend and your server is very rude to you. This can really upset us, can’t it? This can really get us worked up. How do we handle it when we’re not walking with the Lord? Maybe we’re rude right back at that person or maybe we talk about him or her behind their back. Maybe we leave little or no tip just to get back at the person! Whatever it is, there’s no compassion, no patience, no kindness. What’s more is that, maybe all throughout the rest of the day, we’re telling people about that lousy server we had. Even more so is that, maybe anytime that restaurant comes up in a conversation we recant this experience to others. This one little teeny, tiny incident goes on and on.

Now think about that same scenario when you’re truly close to the Lord. Think about it. How different would you be? How would you treat that person? How would you feel yourself? You’d be vastly different, wouldn’t you? What a tremendous difference in such a small seemingly insignificant matter.

Friends, we need to stay with God. Not because you won’t have problems. You will. You will still have your share of hardships, struggles, challenges and difficulties. They won’t be any different. But you will be different.

People who walk with the Lord (and do their best not to stray), operate on a whole other level, don’t they? It’s amazing. Their whole world may be crashing in around them but they are fine! They have this inner peace, quiet confidence. They can still walk with dignity.

Because as long as you’re with God, and Jesus and the Holy Spirit, your problems are never big. Even when they appear big, they are not. Because being with our Heavenly Father gives you things that you can never get anywhere else. Like what? Like:

Hope-when there is absolutely no evidence for it;
Confidence- in the abilities that God gave you;
Strength-knowing that it is He who guides you;
Joy-in being His child;
Peace-knowing He’ll never forsake you;
Calm-in the midst of the storm;
Creativity-to get ideas and solutions;
Ideas, Solutions and finally
Answers

When we stay close to the One Big True Answer you will get all those little answers you need.

So with all that being said, understood and believed, why did God put this tendency in us to stray from Him?

Just for that reason.

So that when we have strayed & we cry out to Him and He answers us, it proves to us even more, how much He loves us. And at no time is his mercy and love for us more evident than when we are so undeserving of it. When we have strayed and we find ourselves in the thick of problems, He is there to call out to: Help Lord! Save me! I need You!

God has the ability and power to help us, even when we can’t help ourselves and even when we are so undeserving. We can never realize His greatness and awesome power unless we’re brought to a place of weakness and need his enduring mercy.
Getting to a place of needing Him allows Him to show us His love, kindness and mercy again, and again, and again. Without needing Him, how can He come to our aid? How can He show us He is the Lord?

Without us having strayed, we can’t get to know Him in an even more glorified way than we did before we strayed. It brings us to a new level of closeness to Him. A deeper relationship. Without stray, there can be no reunion. Without stray there cannot be a stronger bond formed than there was before. A deeper love discovered, more gratitude felt, more grace experienced, more awareness of His awesome power and moreover His tremendous love for us. I heard someone once say that you can’t give a testimony without having a test. True words.



Also when we do start to stray from the Lord, we know it. Maybe not consciously at first, but we start to notice something missing, even before we hit troubled times. There is a void. The only thing that can fill that void is God.

It’s like my son. He’s two. If he’s playing with something, say his Leggos, and he can’t connect two pieces together, it’s a big problem to him. He may get upset, frustrated, angry, even stamp his feet. But then along sweeps in Daddy or Mommy, who seemingly floats on in, puts their hands over his hands and helps him connect those pieces together that were, just a moment ago, the biggest problem in his life(!) Then they walk away and he’s standing there, problem totally solved. He got the help he needed from his loving parent just when he really needed it, when he cried out. And an even deeper bond was formed between parent and child. Even if you are not a parent you (hopefully) still know what the love of a parent feels like, whether it was from your parent, relative or anyone that guided you and protected you as you grew up. Or maybe it is you who are that guiding help to a child in your life. As a parent, it gives me awesome pleasure to be able to do even something so small like that for him.

There are, I’m sure, people who are able to rarely stray and that’s what we should all strive for, but the tendency is still there. However, don’t despair if you stray from the Lord, as long as you come back home, it’s a constant and never ending chance for Him to show His love for us. What a blessing that is. Not only does He love us already, created us, gives us so much. But even that, is not enough for Him. He wants to prove to us His love even more! Great is He!

So this tendency is a way for Him to do that, time and time again, throughout our lives. And this gives us, His children, the opportunity to experience this love time and time again.


To Him be the Glory!
God Bless You!

YOU HAVE ME LORD

I met my husband in 1995. I’d just turned 31. We got married in 1998. I was 34. We tried to start to have a family in 2000. I was 36; a bit old to start but certainly not past child bearing age. That was the start of a long and uphill battle. It lasted three and a half years.

We went from trying naturally, to months of fertility testing. Four artificial inseminations and four IVF’s, acupuncture twice a week for about a year and drinking (horrible tasting) Chinese tea twice daily. I won’t kid you; there were times that it was unbearable. But finally on the fourth IVF attempt in July of 2004 we found out we were pregnant! Praise God! I had not been ‘born again’ per se yet but was very close to God. But the minute we found out, it was like those three and a half years just disappeared. Like they never existed. I didn’t care how old I was, how much time had passed. All that mattered was that I was pregnant. We were overjoyed.

I was carrying twins but my fertility Dr told me that one looked smaller and weaker. He told me he didn’t expect that one to make it. I said OK and moved on with my pregnancy still happy that I had one healthy baby! My pregnancy OB told me the same. And on my second sonogram told me that, in fact, the other baby stopped forming because he heard only one heartbeat. Again the other baby looked fine and healthy. We were sad but figured at least he or she was with God. However at my next sono, the tech heart two heartbeats. Needless to say I was shocked. OK, so back to carrying two but the second was behind the first in development. Then came my amnio. The Dr suggested he only take fluid from the healthy baby’s sac because we already knew the other baby probably would not make it. My husband was very adamant. He said we’re currently having two. Take from the two as long as it didn’t pose any health danger to anyone involved. I thought about it and agreed with him. We told this to the Dr who respected and honored our decision. When the results came in, our son (yes a boy!) was fine but our daughter was not. She had something called anencephaly which is a very severe neural tube disorder along the lines of spina bifida but worse. If she made it to delivery she could not live. Most babies die in a few minutes, some last weeks and in rare cases months. But she’d have to be in the hospital the entire time. The doctor brought up the option of doing something called ‘selective reduction’ which is basically aborting the unhealthy baby. We discussed it with him and between ourselves and decided that that was just not for us. I even spoke with my priest about it who said if the baby was sure to die, it was not ‘wrong’ by the church. But we decided no. Whatever was going to happen with her would be left to God, not us.

Then at my twenty-seventh week I had some spotting and called the Dr. I went in for a precaution to the maternity ward at the hospital. The very next day I ended up having our twins through c-section. Our little girl was first. We named her Veronica Ann. She lived three minutes but we had a priest waiting there who baptized her immediately. Then came our son. Up until this point we had not decided on a boy’s name. My husband had been pulling for the name David all along but I just couldn’t commit to it. Before I had the twins the Dr’s had explained that because I was delivering three months early our son would have to stay in the hospital probably until around his due date. We knew it would be a tough battle. So he had to give him the name of a warrior, a champion, a hero.

David it was.

Finally our child was here! After so long. The next 3 months were not easy. There were many scary moments and many victorious ones. Finally the day came, March 11th, three days after his due date, we brought him home. Halleluiah!

He came home attached to a monitor at all times that would go off if any of his vital signs dropped too low. We also had oxygen tanks in the house just in case he stopped breathing. Not exactly the kind of homecoming you’d expect. But we were still in bliss. The months went by. David grew. Little by little he continued to progress. Eventually we took him off the monitor. Originally he had something called micro-aspiration and had to have thickened-up formula. Finally in November of 2005 that went away and he could go back to the breast milk that I’d been pumping all the while.

When he was discharged from the hospital one of the nurses told me that there was a good chance that David would need some kind of physical therapy. Most preemies like him did but that it was just a temporary thing. In time, he’d be fine. At the time, I thought- that may be the case with other babies. But not my son. No way. No way is he going to need that. Well, sure enough, several months later they told me he would, in fact need it. Right around this time I got saved. But friends, hearing this news was one of the most devastating things I could hear. I didn’t know exactly what it entailed. But I just knew this meant our struggle would go on.

I explained it to my husband like this. David is basically my ‘job’ now. I had worked on Wall Street for 18 years. But this was now my full-time job. At earlier appointments the Doctors and therapists had given me some exercises to do with David. I probably didn’t do them as much as I should have which is why he needed the physical therapy. So hearing this news was like going in for a review at work and finding out that my work wasn’t good enough. It was tantamount to me getting a bad review, but worse because it was my child. I vividly remember driving home in the car, sobbing uncontrollably. All we had been through. Three and have years to get pregnant, having the twins prematurely, one of them dying, David in the hospital for three months and coming home on monitors and medication. Finally, I had thought, we’d come to a place of arrival. And now, we get the news that no, our struggles were not over, and that we had to do more. I just couldn’t understand why God was putting us through this.

Other people got pregnant with the blink of an eye, have healthy pregnancies, healthy babies, multiple times over. But we were going through so much just with our first, let alone the fact that we wanted more. So in the car I wept and wept.

Finally I just looked up and said, “God, I can’t do this. I have literally no strength, no resolve, no ambition, and no will to do this. Lord You are going to have to do this. I am at my end. I simply cannot do this. You will have to do this. And then I exhaled, thinking I had really told Him!

But instead, an unexpected thing happened. From out of nowhere I immediately felt a huge weight being taken from my shoulders. I felt lighter, somehow at peace. At a time that I had no reason to be at peace, I was. And somehow I knew why. I knew God had said: “OK, I’ll come in. I’ll come to your aid.” I didn’t know how, when or why but I knew He would help. By this time I had studied and prayed enough that I realized that I had been trying to go this alone. And that was wrong. I hadn’t given it to God yet. But at the moment that I did, He stepped in and took over. I knew that it would be OK. I guess God was waiting patiently for me to bring this problem to Him. To lay it at His feet and ask for help. He must have thought “Finally she gets it.”

Well, David did, in fact start physical therapy and occupational therapy. His progress was slow but steady. I liked his therapists and they were a good sounding board for me. Around the time he turned one, one of his therapists suggested speech therapy. I decided against it at first but a few months later I agreed. He was evaluated and found eligible for it. We also upped his PT to three times a week because he wasn’t walking yet or even cruising. Eventually he even received special instruction which is like Special Ed because he was behind cognitively too. We were now at a point where he was getting eight therapies a week. It was tough at times trying to keep up with when I had to be home with him and make sure he was up & fed for a therapist to come! He progressed slowly. One of his therapists nicknamed him “slow and steady”. That was fine by me as long as he was steady!

When he turned two, he still wasn’t talking at all. That didn’t bother me so much but other things started to creep up in my mind. Other than talking, there were still some things he wasn’t doing that he should have been and other things that he did do that we didn’t understand. I made a ‘laundry list’ of these things and showed it to his special instruction therapist since most of them, we felt, were cognitive. She looked at the list and just kind of sighed. I’m not sure what she was thinking. Yes, he had made a lot of progress but I was starting to wonder if there was something more seriously ‘wrong’. I remember telling her “I want to know if I’m still going to be changing his diapers when he’s five or even ten.” I wanted her to say “Of course not! Are you crazy? He’ll be fine!” She didn’t know for sure. No one did. That was the problem. We spoke about doing some neurological testing as a future possibility and then she left. That was a Monday. That was a horrible day for me. I tried to stay positive but I was attacked from all sides by the enemy with fear and doubt. I was angry, frightened, confused, and depressed. I broke down in tears several times that day. I remember thinking those same thoughts as in the car, again. But this time, they were worse because now, we were not talking about something temporary like PT but something possibly permanently wrong. This time, this day, I was crushed. Same thoughts: Why us? Why can’t we be normal? Why is God doing this to us? Fear literally gripped me.

Towards the end of the day I walked downstairs to my basement to get something in our storage closet. It’s a big walk-in closet with sliding doors with have mirrors on them. I remember getting what I needed, then taking a step backwards out of the closet, and sliding one of the doors closed. I saw my face in the mirror. I stared a second and then looked away and thought: “God, what is it what you want from me regarding this?”
The answer came right to my head. Immediately I saw Jesus in my mind coming right in my face very directly, saying “I want to know if you will go all the way, the distance. Will you walk through the fire with me?” He said it very ‘loud’, very direct, very pointed, almost in my face. I understood exactly what He meant. He was saying to me, you say I’m your personal Lord and Savior. But I want to know, right now, if your son is mentally challenged and that is what I give you, will you still walk with me? Will you still sing My praises and worship and love Me and praise Me?

Right around this time I had read an amazing story by Darlene Bishop who at one point in her life had a terrible sickness of some kind in her breasts. It sounded awful because her breasts bled and were terribly painful. But at one point she declared “God if this breast falls off…as long as there’s a breath in m body, I’ll still preach you’re Jehovah Raphe”. That article really blew me away. That she could so emphatically be that way during a terrible illness. I remember thinking I don’t know if I could have done that.”

But at that moment, friend, I knew that that was exactly what God was asking me. “Will you be with me even if your worst fear comes true?” I was still standing in from of that closet. I knew enough to not just blurt out a yes, but that God was asking me to make a true decision and not take it lightly and answer out of reaction. I stood there and thought about it. Truly, deeply, honestly, if that is what it came to, how would I handle it? Finally the answer came and swept over my entire body. I turned, looked in the mirror as if I was looking right at Jesus and said “Yes Lord, if that is what Your will is, for me, Steve and I, for David, then yes. You have my promise. I won’t leave you. I’ll trust You. I’ll go the distance, whatever that is. I will walk through the fire with you. No matter what happens. I’ll submit to Your will. A took a big breath in and out. And I walked away, with a sense of peace that the war was over. I would stop fighting God. He’ll give me strength to deal with this or whatever I need when I need it.

I walked upstairs knowing full well what I had committed to and being at peace with it. I didn’t worry anymore. I had no more doubt or anxiety but a quiet strength and knowledge that I would be alright. That day finally came to an end. But before I’d gone to bed I started to get a feeling. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I began to become aware of something in my conscience. It was something small, very small, but it was there. Friend it was something called hope.

I’d traveled from fear and confusion to acceptance and peace that day. But strangely enough, I now had this little bit of hope. Earlier that day I had told my husband about the day and my fears. He had always remained positive but as I read him my infamous laundry list, he, too, started to think maybe there was something more seriously wrong. Now as we got ready to go to bed I told him. “Steve I don’t know where this came from, but, all of a sudden, I have a hope. I have a hope.” I couldn’t word it any differently than that. I remember thinking that he must have thought ‘she’s all over the place!” But I could tell that he seemed to get hopeful too.

But now I had to back up my hope with action. I poured the internet for any help. I made kind of a ‘lesson plan’ for myself to do with David every day. I focused on all the things he wasn’t doing and on how his therapists worked with him. It was tough the first few days. I had to get even more patience than I already had. I would, every so often, get a feeling of fear or doubt, but I fought them all and I was beginning to win the fight. What’s more, friend, is that my son was beginning to change. Not long before I started, he responded. He started being more communicative. At first, just with me, but then, with others too. He started to become more aware of his surroundings. He started to do more age appropriate things. He was improving! We were excited! I started to keep a journal of his progress that I would write in whenever he did something new or better. At first it was every few days that I’d put one or maybe two things in. Within a couple of weeks it was probably every day I’d write one or two things. Then I found myself forgetting things to write because a few days would go by and I was losing count because he was doing so much more and better. Praise the Lord!

He wasn’t talking yet but all the other things started to click into place. And even though he wasn’t talking, he was getting a little bit closer everyday. I remember only about a week after I’d given David’s special instruction teacher my infamous laundry list to look at we’d noticed and were discussing the changes and improvements. She said “It’s like that whole list that you gave me last week, he’s doing now.” I thought about it and she was right!

So what exactly changed in that week? Well, yes, I could say something like: “Well, I started doing more proactive teaching with him or this thing or that thing”. But all that stuff is academic. If I were to truly believe that, I’d be a fool. And I’m not a fool. I am a child of God. He is my Savior, my Redeemer, my Hope, my Heart and my Strength. He changed our David, pure and simple. It’s not complicated. It happened when I submitted, when I truly obeyed. When I trusted and said I’ll follow You Jesus, with no conditions, no strings, no guarantees. You have me Lord. I am Yours.

Amen.
To Him be the Glory!
God Bless You!

Why is it so hard to walk the walk sometimes?

Have you ever asked yourself or experienced this? We’re going along in our walk; everything is fine, wonderful even. And then somehow at some point, we realize that we’ve strayed. We’re in a place or situation that is not where we want to be. We ask ourselves “how did I get here? I know better than this.” Has this ever happened to you? It has to me. But how does this happen? Why does it happen?

Why it happens is a simple answer friend. Because we are flesh. We may want to over complicate it with all kinds of “reasons” or explanations. A bad childhood, a stressful job, hard marriage, rebellious kids; the list can go on. But really, truly, it is because we are man.
And this is a condition of the flesh.

The apostle Paul wrote:

“For the flesh has desires against the spirit, and the spirit against the flesh; these are opposed to each other, so that you may not do what you want.” (Gal 5:17)

This doesn’t mean to say, however, that it’s hopeless or that we should just give in to the ways of the flesh. It just answers the question of why. And that’s important because we spend much of our time struggling with just this question. I know I’ve probably spent an enormous amount of time on wondering ‘why I did x’ or ‘why I didn’t do y’. But no matter how many things we can come up with and try to fix, we’ll still come down to the fact that we ‘fall’ in our walk because we are human; we are flesh & the flesh is weak. And there is nothing we can do to change that. However we shouldn’t want to change our humanness. God created us in His image so we should be happy with the creations that we are. But God also gave us a mind and a spirit that can claim victory over these challenges and give us the strength to change!


Now that we know why it happens, I’m going to give some common ways how this can easily happen and then finally some ways to avoid this in your future. I pray these will help you in your walk as they have me.



1-People Pleasing

Are you a people pleaser? Going along with the crowd even when you know it’s not the Godly thing? You hear comments like “Everybody does it.” Or “It’s no big deal,” or others similar things and you cave. Here is an example of how we can get tripped up because we’re people pleasers.
Say you are at work and there’s a group of your co-workers talking. You’re even good friends with some of them. They start gossiping about a fellow worker or they start to criticize you boss. Maybe you even agree with them in your head but are not getting involved directly in the conversation. Finally, eventually someone elicits your opinion. For some unexplained reason (flesh!) you take the bait. Before you know it, you’re gossiping.
Mind you, gossip is a national pastime in this country thanks to the media pushing it constantly. We are flooded with shows that say they’re about the entertainment industry but are loaded with “celebrity” gossip. Sometimes you even hear this on the nightly news! It’s very easy to get caught up in it. But I urge you; don’t take the enemy’s bait! Because that’s what it is. Don’t serve the enemy. He’s got enough “soldiers”!

For those of us (me too) who are sometimes people pleasers remember: stay focused on your walk with the Lord. And understand one undeniable fact. Pleasing both God & man is hard sometimes but is impossible to do all the time. Be OK with the fact that sometimes “man” is not going to be happy with you because of your choices for God.
Memorize this scripture from the apostle Paul:

“If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a slave to Christ.” (Gal 1:10)

This helps me to be OK about not pleasing people all the time.


2-Face-Off
Facing a person or uncomfortable situation sometimes seems harder to do than the Godly thing. What I mean is that, in that moment it’s “easier” to rebel against God because He’s not physically here in the same way that people are. That bully at school or that intimidating person at work or home seems a lot more real then God at times! Also our time of facing God is a long way off (or so we assume). God is not as present in the same way so the earthly confrontation appears harder in the moment.
Here’s an example that we may run into. Say you’re part of a group that’s going out to see a movie. One movie comes up for selection but is a movie that is ungodly. Do you voice your opinion or do you stay quiet? Maybe some others in the group are “louder” than you. Sometimes there is a dynamic in a group of friends that one person somehow ‘leads’ the group much of the time. The others just follow along. They’re wishy-washy which is how the other person gets to have the control. Control is basically given to him or her. The other people may not necessarily want to give control to that person. But they don’t want to be the “problem person’ in the group. Again, voicing their opinion seems harder to do in the moment than not. But while doing that they’re probably ignoring that still small voice. Is that you? Maybe you didn’t even realize what they were doing or the full implications of it until just now.

Friends, we must think beyond this moment. I think this is just a temporary moment of weakness. But again, accept the fact that sometimes we’re going to have “uncomfortable” moments. Also, we may actually (but unintentionally) make others feel uncomfortable, not by anything we do but by something we won’t do.
That’s OK. That’s part of the walk. It means we’re growing closer to our heavenly Father.


3-Peer pressure (this is not reserved just for children and teenagers)
Here are some phrases we hear probably every day. “It’s no big deal”, “Everybody does it.” “Live a little”. These are just a few of the over used phrases that people just throw out when they want you to go along with what they want. Notice the word they want. Sometimes we don’t even want to do whatever it is, but if everyone else is doing it, it’s only natural to feel pressure. It’s understandable why we sometimes cave sometimes.

But I’d ask you a question. If everyone else is truly doing it, are these really the people you should be with? I’m not saying you run for the hills & never speak to these people again! But start to seek others who are walking more with the Lord. That’s how we do it. Again, there is no magic formula but there are things we can start to do to lesson our opportunities to feel peer pressure. And finding some good people to be with is a great way.

4- We want to “belong”, be accepted.

It’s a basic human need. And there’s nothing wrong with it, as long as we keep it in perspective. We can strive to be accepted but only if it doesn’t compromise our walk with Jesus.
Here’s a seemingly innocent example of how wanting to belong can trip us up. Perhaps there’s a TV show that you hear people you know talking about. You’ve never seen it. But one night you’re flicking your remote and see it on. So you watch for a bit. You realize that its content is not something that supports your walk with Christ. (It’s probably an HBO show) You’re about to turn it off but then a voice says, ‘watch it because people will be talking about it tomorrow and you won’t be left out of the conversation if you watch it tonight.’ So you do. The next thing you know you’re watching it for months, sometimes years. All the while getting so many un-Christ-like messages in your head from this show. If it is network television with commercials, then even the commercials you see during this program are going to be more in line with the show’s content. If it’s a movie channel, all the plugs for their different shows will be about shows that coincide with the one you’re watching.
Friends, let’s not confuse being accepted with our overall desire to follow and be with the Lord. And remember one thing: it is written:

“As it is, you do not belong to the world….” (John 15:19)

So don’t worry about “belonging” all the time. You already belong to God Almighty! Reminding yourself of this will save you a lot of internal struggle.



5-We get caught up in a moment.

Emotions can get the best of us at any moment’s time. Especially since the current culture we live in does almost everything predicated on emotion or how we feel, usually in that one moment. We’re constantly berated with messages of ‘get it now’, ‘why wait?’, ‘if it feels good, do it’, ‘if it’s not hurting anyone, why not?’ These are all excuses to do whatever we want, whenever we want to, which usually stems from acting on emotion in the moment. People on TV and in the movies do things in an instant. They jump into bed in record time, quit their job without a second thought. And of course there are never any negative consequences that they incur. Everything works out beautifully in their lives. Yes, it usually does in TV or movie-land. But there’s absolutely no message of pause or restraint nowadays. And that’s how we can get caught up acting on emotion in a moment of weakness.
But friends, when we have this in the forefront of our mind we will be better at fighting the enemy in that moment and the moments that follow. Remember we may not be able to loosen his grip on the world but we can certainly loosen his grip on our lives. Let’s not live by emotion. Especially emotion in the moment.


6-The world we live in-LIES, LIES and MORE LIES

This world, this country, and especially this culture is getting less and less Christ-like everyday. I think we all know that but gang; it’s going to continue to get worse. I’m not being negative. I just want you to understand this so we can spend our time more in God’s word and furthermore with God’s people. The more Satan gets a grip on this world the more we have to remember this because the world will not remind us anymore. It used to be that current culture held to a certain level of responsibility and dignity. But those days are no more. In fact the current culture actually rejects that notion because they wrongly see it as someone judging them. (Wait until they get to the real judgment).

Now even our basic right of freedom is warped. The thinking is ‘If I want to do ‘x’ I should be allowed to it, and even our constitution should uphold it. But if I don’t like what you’re doing or saying, you shouldn’t do it or say it around me, and our constitution should uphold that too. Is that what the founding fathers had in mind when they made freedom of speech???? In the immortal words of Charlie Brown “Uggh!”

This is just another misconception of our world thanks to Satan. His lies are reaching
people like never before. People are listening to him and we must be aware of this fact. Understand he has one goal, to destroy the world and us. He’ll do whatever it takes to do that. Understand something friends. He is not called the “father of lies” because he sometimes lies. He always lies. Everything out of his mouth a lie. He is not even capable of telling the truth. It is written:

“When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”(John 8:45)

We must wake up from this vegetated state that we’ve been in. That alone will bring you closer to Jesus. It will lesson the enemy’s grip, maybe not on this world, but at least on you. And once you are out of his grip you can begin helping others!


Remember that first quote about the flesh and the spirit being opposed to each other? Here’s something that I often think about. Do you realize that the word LIVE spelled backwards is EVIL? And the word DEVIL backwards is LIVED? I wonder, is that a coincidence? Or maybe God has done this to remind us that we should not live for this world because this world has evils in it. Of course this world has many good things as well but at the very least we need to remember this.

Now the word DOG spelled backwards is GOD. I don’t think this is a new notion but let’s look closer at it. When we think of a dog, tell me what would you say is the number one word we think of? Probably the first thing we think of is loyal. Dogs are loyal to the day’s end, aren’t they? If you’ve ever had a dog you know they follow you around sometimes from room to room;they just want to be with you. Every time you walk in the door it’s a celebration whether you’ve been gone an hour or a whole day! They’re also forgiving. You’re 100% accepted to a dog. They are known for protecting both their masters and their homes, sometimes with fierce aggression. It’s literally part of their genetic make-up. And of course the dog’s most identifiable description: “Man’s best friend.” The dog it seems was made to just love us unconditionally. Is that a coincidence? I wonder. I think God has a sense of humor, don’t you?!

But how do some people treat their dogs? There are many cases of dog abuse and abandoned dogs are found daily. Sometimes they are even malnourished & in poor health. When we read or see stories of dog abuse or neglect, it’s actually hard to watch, most of the time we have to look away. Part of the reason is because the dog’s owner has a certain power of their dog. The dog relies on him or her to walk it, feed it and provide shelter for it. Unfortunately, not all dog owners do that. Because as much as the dog loves their owner, it doesn’t mean they’ll be loved back. That’s kind of the way some people treat God isn’t it? That power that the owner has over the dog is like our free will. God doesn’t make us worship or praise or follow him. What we do with that free will is tantamount to how we treat God isn’t it? Just something to think about….


7-Lead us not into temptation.

Another reason why it’s hard to walk the walk sometimes is because we don’t always pay attention to that still small voice. There are times that we’re stronger than other times. And it’s not really our job to know when that is exactly. But it is our responsibility to avoid a situation that could even lead us into temptation let alone saying no to it.

Consider the Lord’s Prayer. It says:
“Lead us not into temptation”

Another popular prayer is the Prayer of Jabez which says:
“And that you would keep me from evil.”

Notice this doesn’t say let me go to evil & then resist it. It doesn’t say let me allow evil to come to me and then resist it. It says essentially: don’t even bring me to evil, keep me away from it. We humans have a knack of walking toward evil even bringing ourselves face to face with it and then if we’re not able to resist it we feel badly about ourselves.

Guess what? God knew this. That’s why He says throughout the bible don’t even go there. Avoid it altogether! God knew we were human & that it would be very hard for us to resist. Remember that He made us. He knows what our strengths and weaknesses are because He put them there. Let’s listen to his instructions for our bodies! That’s why He says don’t even put yourself it evil’s ugly face! We don’t have to look temptation square in the eye every time because we simply aren’t strong enough to resist all the time. Of course there are times that you are going to be faced with it anyway. But we also need to do our part here.

If anyone is in any kind of recovery program, you know they tell you when you’re in recovery to not hang out at the places that you did either drugs or drinking or over-eating in whatever your addiction was. If you’re an alcoholic, avoid bars or even restaurants with big bar areas. They even warn you to stay away from friends that you did your addiction with. This is sound advice & I’ll bet the vast majority of people that are in successful recovery can attest to this wise way to stay on the good path. This is no different gang. Sure sometimes we can be strong enough to resist temptation but many times we can choose not even to face it. Does that mean we’re weak? Of course not. Friends, it means we’re being obedient


These are just a few of the ways that lead us down a path away from the Lord. When faced with these things and our humanness, it is hard to walk the walk at times.

But take heart, because it doesn’t have to be that way! Now that you know these, you’ll be armed to recognize them & change them. Gang, this is one of the most liberating things we can do for ourselves. It seems hard on the surface but if I can do it anyone can! Yes, we’re flesh & the flesh is weak. But don’t ever forget that we are created in God’s image. Jesus Christ is in us! Our flesh is weak but our spirit is powerful! Jesus said if we have faith not only can we do the things that he did but we can do more! It’s time to start trusting that this is true and living that way on a daily basis. Not just on the big things but all these little things that we’ve talked about above.


But how do we break out of this?

Well it’s not a big production, not a “systematic program” or even a crash course on obedience. Just the opposite. The answer is ‘one’. One day at a time. One decision at a time, sometimes one moment at a time.

If you overeat, it’s one meal at a time.
If you suffer verbal abuse from your spouse or family, it’s one snide remark at a time.
If you have problems at work with a person or project, it’s one encounter or one step at a time.
If you deal with confusion or indecisiveness like I did (and still do sometimes!) it’s one choice at a time.
If you’re raising children it’s literally one moment at a time.

You see the trend. It’s just taking each thing on, one at a time, and not worrying about the next time or situation.

But what happens if you don’t know what to do during one of those times?
If you get stuck, don’t ever say out loud or even just in your head “I can’t do this” or “I can’t do this anymore.” (remember #6-the enemy’s lies?) Replace it with “Can I do or handle this one thing right now? Usually your brain will answer “yes”. Then you say “OK. Lord, how do you want me to handle this? Ask the Lord right then and there and be open to any answer that comes to you as long as you know it is coming from the Lord. And then trust and do it. Act or handle it in a way that shows and testifies that you are a child of God. Because you are. That’s where you overcome. That’s where the rubber meets the road as they say. That’s where the power and strength comes to you that you didn’t know you had. You didn’t have it as long as you lived in the flesh. But in that moment you surrendered your flesh & let God give you His answer. That’s when your Spirit gets stronger and starts to awaken in you the power that God gave us and that Jesus gave His life for.

Then, after that moment, don’t start worrying about the next time(s). Don’t even give it a thought. If you start thinking or projecting about the future then enemy will get some ground in your mind. He’ll plant some seeds that we cannot let take root. That’s part of trusting God. He got you through this tough moment by leaning on Him. He’ll get you through the others. He’ll get you through any fire or storm that life throws at you. You need to trust him 1000%. Friends, he’s money in the bank. He’s your only “lock” in life as the betters’ say. And what a great thing to have a loving heavenly powerful Father as your lock!


Here are some comebacks that I pray will help you when offered something you know you don’t want to have or don’t want to do. They are just some simple things to say when you don’t know what to say in those moments. It is my prayer that they help you to turn a possible moment of weakness into a moment of victory and success! Amen!

Question: Would you like some “x”?

1-No, thank you. (no need to even explain yourself)
2-Thank you, no. (again, unless someone asks you further that’s all you need to say)
3-No thank, I’m satisfied. (it’s hard for someone to push you after you state that)
4-I don’t care for that (anymore) (once you say that it doesn’t make sense for the person to ask you again if you don’t like something)
5-I don’t feel like it right now (that should go over fine in our culture!)
6-If people are gossiping or badmouthing others & someone asks you for your opinion just say: I don’t really know that person or that situation 100% so I really couldn’t say.
(even if you do know the situation very well you can still say: I’m not that person so I couldn’t really say. Leave it at that; don’t say another word)
7-Sing a song of praise or hum a hymn even if it’s only in your head; try to really think about the words. This will give you instant inner strength and resolve!
8-Say a quote from the bible that can get you through the moment-either aloud or to yourself. Every time Christ was tempted in the desert He answered with “It is written …”. It worked for him!
9-No thanks, I have a headache/stomach ache/don’t feel well/am tired/don’t have the time/have to go. (this answers the question and gets you off the hook)
10-No thanks, I don’t have much interest in that (anymore). (it’s hard for someone to keep pushing something on you when you give an answer like this)
11-That’s not my cup of tea (anymore) (same as above)
12-I don’t care for that. Then turn it around and ask them a question about it for example: You (still) like that? But it must be in a gracious non-condemning way. (all your doing here is basically changing the subject; taking the pressure off of you)
13-Offer some friendly, Christ-like advice that’s non-condemning. You never know; this may literally be the first time that that person is hearing something like this. You have a chance to help bring them to change! To bring them a step towards Jesus!!!
14-Don’t even give them an answer. Just ask them a question; again making certain it is in a kind way; gentle, friendly earnest advice.
15-Pretend you didn’t hear them. Don’t even answer; just change the subject.
16-Pretend you didn’t hear them! Say nothing. They literally may not ask again.
17-Say a quick no thank you & then immediately change the subject. Asking a question to them is an excellent tool because it literally takes their mind away from the topic too. Have a question in mind. It doesn’t have to be anything important. It could be simple like: “Is it cold out?” Or “Where did you get that sweater?” (or fill in the blank with anything) or “What time is the game on tonight or what time is X happening? “ Or even simply “What time is it?”
I know these may sound silly or too simple but try them a few times & you’ll be amazed how easily they work!

Good luck & God Bless
TO HIM BE THE GLORY!

Trust God

“My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” (2Cor 12:8)


I read somewhere that sheep are so dumb that if while being herded they were led to a cliff they would literally run off the cliff. And not just the first few. But each and every one of them. Isn’t it interesting then that in the Bible we are compared to as sheep? That may not exactly sound like a compliment!

It’s not a compliment. But it’s not an insult either. After all, we are made in God’s image. But it’s not that man is so dumb. It is that God is so wise. Compared to Almighty God we are about as wise as a sheep – if that! And that’s the message in the quote above.

To me this quote makes one thing loud and clear.

God wants us to trust Him

He’s saying He wants us to put all our faith, all our hopes, fears, anxieties, dreams, everything we have struggling inside of us in His hands. He can handle it.

Now as believers we receive that news and it sounds good, on the surface. But aren’t there times in our lives that this is extremely hard? I know it is for me.



It’s so easy to second guess God isn’t it? So easy to wonder why something is happening to us or not happening to us. Why do we do that I wonder? I think it’s because we get two important concepts confused. We start to confuse the concept of free will (that God gives us) and the concept of giving God ultimate control. There is a definite difference.

God gave us free will. We have control over the decisions we make, the actions we take. It’s totally in our hands. But that’s where it ends for us. Because as much as we can do, who ultimately controls the outcome? Who controls the result? Not us. God does.

So often we blame “circumstances” for where we are in life. “My boss didn’t give me that promotion. It’s his fault.” Well yes, we can control our actions to do the extra work to help get that promotion. But in the end God makes the call as to whether we receive that promotion. Not us. Not even your boss!

If we are going to grow in our walk with God now is the time to make a change in our thinking, in our actions and especially in our words. We need to make trusting God an action. We need to walk in our reliance on God everyday. Remember that God knew us before we were even formed in our mother’s womb. God spoke and the world was created. Just from his words! He’s all powerful and He only wants what is right for us in the long run, not the short run. Yet we still actually question Him. No wonder we’re compared to as sheep!

Let’s look at the other side of coin to be fair here. How much is God involved in our daily lives every day in every way? How much does He intercede and protect us from harm in ways we’ll never know? Everyday there are probably thousands of things that can go wrong in our lives. But God holds them in place, makes a wrong right for us, steps in so we can avoid a bad situation that literally goes unnoticed by us. Gang He’s there. He’s always there with us. Let’s be aware of this and be filled with thanks for Him

And let’s show God how much we trust Him! If you’re the person who didn’t get a promotion like the above example, start talking like a believer. A believer says “I didn’t get that promotion because that’s not the right path for me at this time. Anyway God’s got something even better for me down the road.” That’s what a trusting soul would say. How great would it be if we all led our lives like that! In true faith. How much would that please God!

Walking in our reliance in God is hard. It’s not for the faint hearted. I think sometimes Christians are wrongly looked at as weak. We rely on God. Maybe some people think that relying on God means we don’t do anything. But the fact is letting go and letting God takes courage. Great courage. When we let go and give a situation to God and stop trying to control a thing we leave ourselves open. We’re vulnerable and unprotected to the harsh elements of life. But in our hour of weakness God can show His awesome, healing, supernatural power. When we allow Him to step in, we can feel and experience God’s grace. God’s perfect peace. He’s waiting for us to trust Him. And He is pleased when we trust him.

As Paul said in 2 Corinthians 12:10: “…for when I am weak then I am strong.”

God Bless You!
To Him be the glory!

Run so as to Win

Run so as to Win

“Do you not know that the runners in the stadium all run in the race, but only one wins the prize. Run so as to win.” (1 Cor 9:24)

Here is one of my favorite quotes in the Bible. Even though it was written literally thousands of years ago it almost sounds like it is right out of one of the motivational books that are so popular now. I am a little surprised that this quote isn’t more well known because this is something that could help us all in every single area of our lives.

To me there are three parts to this quote to take with us in our lives. At first it seems like the message is-win, go for it, grab that ring. But notice it does not say to “win”. The message is run so as to win.

Let’s look at a baseball analogy that describes running so as to win. A batter hits a blooper to the pitcher. The infielders barely have to hustle to get the ball and throw him out. But this quote is in what the batter is doing. Is he trotting to first? Walking,? Some barely even leave the batters box because it’s an “easy out”. Then there are the others. And they are hauling butt, running as fast as they can to reach first base. That is a person who is running so as to win. It makes no difference to him at that point how he hit the ball. It makes no difference how unlikely it is that he’ll be safe because he cannot control that. All he can control is his body, his legs to run, his arms to pump and his gaze fixed on that first base bag.

Now a batter running in a major league game is a wonderful analogy. But it really only scratches the surface of running so as to win. You see, that athelete had to train long and hard before this. Let’s view one more sports analogy that describes the real heart of running so as to win. Ironically (or maybe not so ironic) running is a great example. If you and I are runners it means we get up perhaps in the early morning, maybe when it’s still dark. Not exactly glamorous, there’s no one there to cheer us on like in the baseball game. Now we start to run. Our feet start to hurt. Maybe we get a blister, maybe it’s freezing out, maybe it’s sweltering out, the elements may be having a field day around and on us! Our thoughts are like a battlefield. “Let’s go home” we hear a voice saying. “We must be crazy to still be out here.” “That’s enough for today.” But when we still run in spite of all those things- we’re running so as to win.

Well gang, life isn’t a baseball game, is it? Most of us are not runners in training. Things aren’t always so black and white. But the message is no different. Let’s remember that running so as to win also means having a winning attitude. And having it when it’s not so easy. In those many small moments of weakness that we all have. When we want to stay in bed, when we want to turn on the TV and ‘veg’. When we want to walk away from something or someone Yes running so as to win is sometimes the hardest thing we can do. It’s why we need God’s grace and strength.

Winning is wonderful and sometimes we will win. But the next layer of this quote is to not be so concerned about the result. In other words let’s not be so focused on getting all the blessings we want. Let’s be concerned with doing in a way that pleases Jesus Christ. What does that mean? That means not complaining to anyone who’ll listen. Not taking the easy way out, not doing it with an attitude purely of obligation. But instead, let’s do it with a cheerful heart, a sincere heart and with a strong sense of purpose because we’re serving Almighty God after all. Those athletes mentioned above would not have made it anywhere if they conducted themselves in a poor manner. If they cut corners, if they trained just because they felt they had to but didn’t have a passion for it. That’s the batter who just trots to first base. That’s the runner who gives in to the voices, cuts their run short, won’t run in inclement weather. If we don’t conduct ourselves in a way that pleases God our efforts will not reflect God’s grace, His glory.

The last layer is no less important and maybe the hardest to live. That is to know that even though we may run so as to win and in a way that pleases God, there is still the chance that whatever we are working towards still may not happen. But not just knowing
it, accepting it. Submitting to God’s plan for us. Ouch! This is very hard for us sometimes isn’t it? I know it is for me. But ultimately God is in real control of everything. He is the Master. And He will only give us what is best for us, even though it may not seem that way in the moment. As hard as it is let’s try to break free from a result we want today for the result of being with God tomorrow. The batter that runs so as to win knows he may not be safe at first. But that’s a chance he’s willing to take.

The Bible tells us that if we believe in Christ we are saved and we will be with Him in heaven. That’s awesome but when we get there, what will Jesus say to us? If we live our life running so as to win I think we’ll hear the words we long to: “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
If we are running so as to win, we have already won in the eyes of our Lord.
God Bless You!
To Him be the Glory!

His Ways

One thing we believe as Christians is God’s omniscience. We believe 100% that God knows everything. And so it follows that since God knows everything, then God, of course, knows what is best for each of us, right? Right. So then, here comes the million dollar question. Why do we not put this into practice? And at times when we need it most. How many times do we doubt God? He says He will never leave us, yet we sometimes feel alone and wonder where He is. He says to be bold and we sometimes shrink from responsibility or any extra effort. He says that with Him there is nothing we cannot do. Yet very often we hardly make any effort to stretch ourselves for Him and really do something with our lives. Why?

I’ll tell you and if you’re really honest, you will agree-Fear. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of being rejected, fear of financial loss, even fear of the unknown and the list goes on. But, as Christians, if we have all these promises from God then why do we fear? The reason is that fear happens when we start to experience a lack of faith. When we begin to stray from God’s word, His ultimate love for us, fear starts knocking. And there is the enemy-always ready-working overtime. He’s just waiting to get a foot in the door! Always lying in wait like an animal about to pounce on it’s prey.

We cannot let this happen! The Bible talks about not giving the enemy a foothold because that is all he needs to start with. But intellectually this doesn’t’ make sense. Why would we (want to) give the enemy this foothold? Actually, we don’t do it as a conscience decision. It just seems to ‘happen’ doesn’t it? This world is so go, go, go and we are bombarded constantly by meaningless distractions. Our cell phone rings, junk mail, the TV, email, the list is endless and you know what they are for you personally too. The vast majority of these interruptions are not important and some even meaningless! (Do you get those emails too?!)

So what can we do? What can we consciously do to keep us focused on God’s love and His will for our lives? Really simple but effective: read the Bible. Read it everyday. Even if it’s for ten minutes; even if it’s only one chapter which is about two pages. And then take the scriptures that give you strength and faith and write them down where they will be easy to locate. Strive to memorize them so you don’t even need to look at them.
That’s all you need to do.

Here are a few of my favorite scriptures that I try to remember when I need them most. They are classified by how I sometimes feel:

When I feel:

Incompetent, Overwhelmed
“…be strengthened with power through his Spirit in the inner self,….” (Eph 3:16)

“Amen, I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” (Matt 17:20)


Weak, Hopeless
“Everything is possible to one who has faith. “ (Mark 9:23)

“Finally, draw your strength from the Lord and from his mighty power. (Eph 6:10)

“My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Cor 12:8)



Hard to persevere, Feel like giving up
“I have told you this so that you might have peace in me. In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world.” (John 16:33)

“Jesus said, “Amen, I say to you, there is no one who has given up…for my sake and for the sake of the gospel who will not receive a hundred times more now in this present age;…and eternal life in the age to come.” (Mark 10:29-30)


Temptation
“Be on your guard, stand firm in the faith, be courageous, be strong.” (1 Cor 16:13)

“It is written: ‘You shall worship the Lord, your God, and him alone shall you serve.” (Luke 4:8)


Losing Hope
“Such confidence we have through Christ toward God.” (2 Cor 3:4)

“We know that all things work for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.” (Rom 8:28)


Alone, Feeling vulnerable
“And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.” (Matt 28:20)

“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, no present things nor future things, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Rom 8:38-39)


Stuck in a rut
“Do you not know that the runners in the stadium all run in the race, but only one wins the prize? Run so as to win.” (1 Cor 9:24)

“In the morning sow your seed, and at evening let not your hand be idle.” (Ecc 11:6)


Distracted, Self-absorbed
“Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun set on your anger, and do not leave room for the devil.” (Eph 4:26)

“…for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” (Luke 18:13)


Lacking faith, Doubt
“…for we walk by faith, not by sight.” (2 Cor 5:7)

“Abba, Father, all things are possible to you. Take this cup away from me but not what I will but what you will.” (Mark 14:36)

“For who hopes for what one sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait with endurance. In the same way, the Spirit too comes to the aid of our weakness;….” (Rom 8:24-26)


Anger, Unforgiveness, Feeling unfairly treated
“When you stand to pray, forgive anyone against whom you have a grievance, so that your heavenly Father may in turn forgive you your transgressions.” (Mark 11:25)

“Brothers, even if a person is caught in some transgression, you who are spiritual should correct that one in a gentle spirit, looking to yourself, so that you also may not be tempted.” (Gal 6:1)


Now after reading those awesome quotes how do you feel? Do you have more faith or less? Do you feel tired or energized? Do you feel weak or strong? Friends, this is the Word of God. His message is always there for us to give us faith when we need it most, when we fear and begin to doubt his wisdom for our lives. Yes, God does know all. But we need to do our part to remember that.

Now imagine how your life would be if you held these quotes dear to your heart and mind. What kind of person would you be? How would you go through life? How would you carry yourself? How would you feel on the inside? What would you do with your life?

We need to be proactive with this. Most of what we see on a daily basis, the TV, radio, magazines don’t talk about God’s power and wisdom. We need to put it there in front of us everyday. This will guarantee our strength, our peace and give us that strong faith that we all need so we can be happy and even joy-filled in Christ.

God Bless You!
To Him be the Glory!