YOU HAVE ME LORD

I met my husband in 1995. I’d just turned 31. We got married in 1998. I was 34. We tried to start to have a family in 2000. I was 36; a bit old to start but certainly not past child bearing age. That was the start of a long and uphill battle. It lasted three and a half years.

We went from trying naturally, to months of fertility testing. Four artificial inseminations and four IVF’s, acupuncture twice a week for about a year and drinking (horrible tasting) Chinese tea twice daily. I won’t kid you; there were times that it was unbearable. But finally on the fourth IVF attempt in July of 2004 we found out we were pregnant! Praise God! I had not been ‘born again’ per se yet but was very close to God. But the minute we found out, it was like those three and a half years just disappeared. Like they never existed. I didn’t care how old I was, how much time had passed. All that mattered was that I was pregnant. We were overjoyed.

I was carrying twins but my fertility Dr told me that one looked smaller and weaker. He told me he didn’t expect that one to make it. I said OK and moved on with my pregnancy still happy that I had one healthy baby! My pregnancy OB told me the same. And on my second sonogram told me that, in fact, the other baby stopped forming because he heard only one heartbeat. Again the other baby looked fine and healthy. We were sad but figured at least he or she was with God. However at my next sono, the tech heart two heartbeats. Needless to say I was shocked. OK, so back to carrying two but the second was behind the first in development. Then came my amnio. The Dr suggested he only take fluid from the healthy baby’s sac because we already knew the other baby probably would not make it. My husband was very adamant. He said we’re currently having two. Take from the two as long as it didn’t pose any health danger to anyone involved. I thought about it and agreed with him. We told this to the Dr who respected and honored our decision. When the results came in, our son (yes a boy!) was fine but our daughter was not. She had something called anencephaly which is a very severe neural tube disorder along the lines of spina bifida but worse. If she made it to delivery she could not live. Most babies die in a few minutes, some last weeks and in rare cases months. But she’d have to be in the hospital the entire time. The doctor brought up the option of doing something called ‘selective reduction’ which is basically aborting the unhealthy baby. We discussed it with him and between ourselves and decided that that was just not for us. I even spoke with my priest about it who said if the baby was sure to die, it was not ‘wrong’ by the church. But we decided no. Whatever was going to happen with her would be left to God, not us.

Then at my twenty-seventh week I had some spotting and called the Dr. I went in for a precaution to the maternity ward at the hospital. The very next day I ended up having our twins through c-section. Our little girl was first. We named her Veronica Ann. She lived three minutes but we had a priest waiting there who baptized her immediately. Then came our son. Up until this point we had not decided on a boy’s name. My husband had been pulling for the name David all along but I just couldn’t commit to it. Before I had the twins the Dr’s had explained that because I was delivering three months early our son would have to stay in the hospital probably until around his due date. We knew it would be a tough battle. So he had to give him the name of a warrior, a champion, a hero.

David it was.

Finally our child was here! After so long. The next 3 months were not easy. There were many scary moments and many victorious ones. Finally the day came, March 11th, three days after his due date, we brought him home. Halleluiah!

He came home attached to a monitor at all times that would go off if any of his vital signs dropped too low. We also had oxygen tanks in the house just in case he stopped breathing. Not exactly the kind of homecoming you’d expect. But we were still in bliss. The months went by. David grew. Little by little he continued to progress. Eventually we took him off the monitor. Originally he had something called micro-aspiration and had to have thickened-up formula. Finally in November of 2005 that went away and he could go back to the breast milk that I’d been pumping all the while.

When he was discharged from the hospital one of the nurses told me that there was a good chance that David would need some kind of physical therapy. Most preemies like him did but that it was just a temporary thing. In time, he’d be fine. At the time, I thought- that may be the case with other babies. But not my son. No way. No way is he going to need that. Well, sure enough, several months later they told me he would, in fact need it. Right around this time I got saved. But friends, hearing this news was one of the most devastating things I could hear. I didn’t know exactly what it entailed. But I just knew this meant our struggle would go on.

I explained it to my husband like this. David is basically my ‘job’ now. I had worked on Wall Street for 18 years. But this was now my full-time job. At earlier appointments the Doctors and therapists had given me some exercises to do with David. I probably didn’t do them as much as I should have which is why he needed the physical therapy. So hearing this news was like going in for a review at work and finding out that my work wasn’t good enough. It was tantamount to me getting a bad review, but worse because it was my child. I vividly remember driving home in the car, sobbing uncontrollably. All we had been through. Three and have years to get pregnant, having the twins prematurely, one of them dying, David in the hospital for three months and coming home on monitors and medication. Finally, I had thought, we’d come to a place of arrival. And now, we get the news that no, our struggles were not over, and that we had to do more. I just couldn’t understand why God was putting us through this.

Other people got pregnant with the blink of an eye, have healthy pregnancies, healthy babies, multiple times over. But we were going through so much just with our first, let alone the fact that we wanted more. So in the car I wept and wept.

Finally I just looked up and said, “God, I can’t do this. I have literally no strength, no resolve, no ambition, and no will to do this. Lord You are going to have to do this. I am at my end. I simply cannot do this. You will have to do this. And then I exhaled, thinking I had really told Him!

But instead, an unexpected thing happened. From out of nowhere I immediately felt a huge weight being taken from my shoulders. I felt lighter, somehow at peace. At a time that I had no reason to be at peace, I was. And somehow I knew why. I knew God had said: “OK, I’ll come in. I’ll come to your aid.” I didn’t know how, when or why but I knew He would help. By this time I had studied and prayed enough that I realized that I had been trying to go this alone. And that was wrong. I hadn’t given it to God yet. But at the moment that I did, He stepped in and took over. I knew that it would be OK. I guess God was waiting patiently for me to bring this problem to Him. To lay it at His feet and ask for help. He must have thought “Finally she gets it.”

Well, David did, in fact start physical therapy and occupational therapy. His progress was slow but steady. I liked his therapists and they were a good sounding board for me. Around the time he turned one, one of his therapists suggested speech therapy. I decided against it at first but a few months later I agreed. He was evaluated and found eligible for it. We also upped his PT to three times a week because he wasn’t walking yet or even cruising. Eventually he even received special instruction which is like Special Ed because he was behind cognitively too. We were now at a point where he was getting eight therapies a week. It was tough at times trying to keep up with when I had to be home with him and make sure he was up & fed for a therapist to come! He progressed slowly. One of his therapists nicknamed him “slow and steady”. That was fine by me as long as he was steady!

When he turned two, he still wasn’t talking at all. That didn’t bother me so much but other things started to creep up in my mind. Other than talking, there were still some things he wasn’t doing that he should have been and other things that he did do that we didn’t understand. I made a ‘laundry list’ of these things and showed it to his special instruction therapist since most of them, we felt, were cognitive. She looked at the list and just kind of sighed. I’m not sure what she was thinking. Yes, he had made a lot of progress but I was starting to wonder if there was something more seriously ‘wrong’. I remember telling her “I want to know if I’m still going to be changing his diapers when he’s five or even ten.” I wanted her to say “Of course not! Are you crazy? He’ll be fine!” She didn’t know for sure. No one did. That was the problem. We spoke about doing some neurological testing as a future possibility and then she left. That was a Monday. That was a horrible day for me. I tried to stay positive but I was attacked from all sides by the enemy with fear and doubt. I was angry, frightened, confused, and depressed. I broke down in tears several times that day. I remember thinking those same thoughts as in the car, again. But this time, they were worse because now, we were not talking about something temporary like PT but something possibly permanently wrong. This time, this day, I was crushed. Same thoughts: Why us? Why can’t we be normal? Why is God doing this to us? Fear literally gripped me.

Towards the end of the day I walked downstairs to my basement to get something in our storage closet. It’s a big walk-in closet with sliding doors with have mirrors on them. I remember getting what I needed, then taking a step backwards out of the closet, and sliding one of the doors closed. I saw my face in the mirror. I stared a second and then looked away and thought: “God, what is it what you want from me regarding this?”
The answer came right to my head. Immediately I saw Jesus in my mind coming right in my face very directly, saying “I want to know if you will go all the way, the distance. Will you walk through the fire with me?” He said it very ‘loud’, very direct, very pointed, almost in my face. I understood exactly what He meant. He was saying to me, you say I’m your personal Lord and Savior. But I want to know, right now, if your son is mentally challenged and that is what I give you, will you still walk with me? Will you still sing My praises and worship and love Me and praise Me?

Right around this time I had read an amazing story by Darlene Bishop who at one point in her life had a terrible sickness of some kind in her breasts. It sounded awful because her breasts bled and were terribly painful. But at one point she declared “God if this breast falls off…as long as there’s a breath in m body, I’ll still preach you’re Jehovah Raphe”. That article really blew me away. That she could so emphatically be that way during a terrible illness. I remember thinking I don’t know if I could have done that.”

But at that moment, friend, I knew that that was exactly what God was asking me. “Will you be with me even if your worst fear comes true?” I was still standing in from of that closet. I knew enough to not just blurt out a yes, but that God was asking me to make a true decision and not take it lightly and answer out of reaction. I stood there and thought about it. Truly, deeply, honestly, if that is what it came to, how would I handle it? Finally the answer came and swept over my entire body. I turned, looked in the mirror as if I was looking right at Jesus and said “Yes Lord, if that is what Your will is, for me, Steve and I, for David, then yes. You have my promise. I won’t leave you. I’ll trust You. I’ll go the distance, whatever that is. I will walk through the fire with you. No matter what happens. I’ll submit to Your will. A took a big breath in and out. And I walked away, with a sense of peace that the war was over. I would stop fighting God. He’ll give me strength to deal with this or whatever I need when I need it.

I walked upstairs knowing full well what I had committed to and being at peace with it. I didn’t worry anymore. I had no more doubt or anxiety but a quiet strength and knowledge that I would be alright. That day finally came to an end. But before I’d gone to bed I started to get a feeling. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I began to become aware of something in my conscience. It was something small, very small, but it was there. Friend it was something called hope.

I’d traveled from fear and confusion to acceptance and peace that day. But strangely enough, I now had this little bit of hope. Earlier that day I had told my husband about the day and my fears. He had always remained positive but as I read him my infamous laundry list, he, too, started to think maybe there was something more seriously wrong. Now as we got ready to go to bed I told him. “Steve I don’t know where this came from, but, all of a sudden, I have a hope. I have a hope.” I couldn’t word it any differently than that. I remember thinking that he must have thought ‘she’s all over the place!” But I could tell that he seemed to get hopeful too.

But now I had to back up my hope with action. I poured the internet for any help. I made kind of a ‘lesson plan’ for myself to do with David every day. I focused on all the things he wasn’t doing and on how his therapists worked with him. It was tough the first few days. I had to get even more patience than I already had. I would, every so often, get a feeling of fear or doubt, but I fought them all and I was beginning to win the fight. What’s more, friend, is that my son was beginning to change. Not long before I started, he responded. He started being more communicative. At first, just with me, but then, with others too. He started to become more aware of his surroundings. He started to do more age appropriate things. He was improving! We were excited! I started to keep a journal of his progress that I would write in whenever he did something new or better. At first it was every few days that I’d put one or maybe two things in. Within a couple of weeks it was probably every day I’d write one or two things. Then I found myself forgetting things to write because a few days would go by and I was losing count because he was doing so much more and better. Praise the Lord!

He wasn’t talking yet but all the other things started to click into place. And even though he wasn’t talking, he was getting a little bit closer everyday. I remember only about a week after I’d given David’s special instruction teacher my infamous laundry list to look at we’d noticed and were discussing the changes and improvements. She said “It’s like that whole list that you gave me last week, he’s doing now.” I thought about it and she was right!

So what exactly changed in that week? Well, yes, I could say something like: “Well, I started doing more proactive teaching with him or this thing or that thing”. But all that stuff is academic. If I were to truly believe that, I’d be a fool. And I’m not a fool. I am a child of God. He is my Savior, my Redeemer, my Hope, my Heart and my Strength. He changed our David, pure and simple. It’s not complicated. It happened when I submitted, when I truly obeyed. When I trusted and said I’ll follow You Jesus, with no conditions, no strings, no guarantees. You have me Lord. I am Yours.

Amen.
To Him be the Glory!
God Bless You!

Why is it so hard to walk the walk sometimes?

Have you ever asked yourself or experienced this? We’re going along in our walk; everything is fine, wonderful even. And then somehow at some point, we realize that we’ve strayed. We’re in a place or situation that is not where we want to be. We ask ourselves “how did I get here? I know better than this.” Has this ever happened to you? It has to me. But how does this happen? Why does it happen?

Why it happens is a simple answer friend. Because we are flesh. We may want to over complicate it with all kinds of “reasons” or explanations. A bad childhood, a stressful job, hard marriage, rebellious kids; the list can go on. But really, truly, it is because we are man.
And this is a condition of the flesh.

The apostle Paul wrote:

“For the flesh has desires against the spirit, and the spirit against the flesh; these are opposed to each other, so that you may not do what you want.” (Gal 5:17)

This doesn’t mean to say, however, that it’s hopeless or that we should just give in to the ways of the flesh. It just answers the question of why. And that’s important because we spend much of our time struggling with just this question. I know I’ve probably spent an enormous amount of time on wondering ‘why I did x’ or ‘why I didn’t do y’. But no matter how many things we can come up with and try to fix, we’ll still come down to the fact that we ‘fall’ in our walk because we are human; we are flesh & the flesh is weak. And there is nothing we can do to change that. However we shouldn’t want to change our humanness. God created us in His image so we should be happy with the creations that we are. But God also gave us a mind and a spirit that can claim victory over these challenges and give us the strength to change!


Now that we know why it happens, I’m going to give some common ways how this can easily happen and then finally some ways to avoid this in your future. I pray these will help you in your walk as they have me.



1-People Pleasing

Are you a people pleaser? Going along with the crowd even when you know it’s not the Godly thing? You hear comments like “Everybody does it.” Or “It’s no big deal,” or others similar things and you cave. Here is an example of how we can get tripped up because we’re people pleasers.
Say you are at work and there’s a group of your co-workers talking. You’re even good friends with some of them. They start gossiping about a fellow worker or they start to criticize you boss. Maybe you even agree with them in your head but are not getting involved directly in the conversation. Finally, eventually someone elicits your opinion. For some unexplained reason (flesh!) you take the bait. Before you know it, you’re gossiping.
Mind you, gossip is a national pastime in this country thanks to the media pushing it constantly. We are flooded with shows that say they’re about the entertainment industry but are loaded with “celebrity” gossip. Sometimes you even hear this on the nightly news! It’s very easy to get caught up in it. But I urge you; don’t take the enemy’s bait! Because that’s what it is. Don’t serve the enemy. He’s got enough “soldiers”!

For those of us (me too) who are sometimes people pleasers remember: stay focused on your walk with the Lord. And understand one undeniable fact. Pleasing both God & man is hard sometimes but is impossible to do all the time. Be OK with the fact that sometimes “man” is not going to be happy with you because of your choices for God.
Memorize this scripture from the apostle Paul:

“If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a slave to Christ.” (Gal 1:10)

This helps me to be OK about not pleasing people all the time.


2-Face-Off
Facing a person or uncomfortable situation sometimes seems harder to do than the Godly thing. What I mean is that, in that moment it’s “easier” to rebel against God because He’s not physically here in the same way that people are. That bully at school or that intimidating person at work or home seems a lot more real then God at times! Also our time of facing God is a long way off (or so we assume). God is not as present in the same way so the earthly confrontation appears harder in the moment.
Here’s an example that we may run into. Say you’re part of a group that’s going out to see a movie. One movie comes up for selection but is a movie that is ungodly. Do you voice your opinion or do you stay quiet? Maybe some others in the group are “louder” than you. Sometimes there is a dynamic in a group of friends that one person somehow ‘leads’ the group much of the time. The others just follow along. They’re wishy-washy which is how the other person gets to have the control. Control is basically given to him or her. The other people may not necessarily want to give control to that person. But they don’t want to be the “problem person’ in the group. Again, voicing their opinion seems harder to do in the moment than not. But while doing that they’re probably ignoring that still small voice. Is that you? Maybe you didn’t even realize what they were doing or the full implications of it until just now.

Friends, we must think beyond this moment. I think this is just a temporary moment of weakness. But again, accept the fact that sometimes we’re going to have “uncomfortable” moments. Also, we may actually (but unintentionally) make others feel uncomfortable, not by anything we do but by something we won’t do.
That’s OK. That’s part of the walk. It means we’re growing closer to our heavenly Father.


3-Peer pressure (this is not reserved just for children and teenagers)
Here are some phrases we hear probably every day. “It’s no big deal”, “Everybody does it.” “Live a little”. These are just a few of the over used phrases that people just throw out when they want you to go along with what they want. Notice the word they want. Sometimes we don’t even want to do whatever it is, but if everyone else is doing it, it’s only natural to feel pressure. It’s understandable why we sometimes cave sometimes.

But I’d ask you a question. If everyone else is truly doing it, are these really the people you should be with? I’m not saying you run for the hills & never speak to these people again! But start to seek others who are walking more with the Lord. That’s how we do it. Again, there is no magic formula but there are things we can start to do to lesson our opportunities to feel peer pressure. And finding some good people to be with is a great way.

4- We want to “belong”, be accepted.

It’s a basic human need. And there’s nothing wrong with it, as long as we keep it in perspective. We can strive to be accepted but only if it doesn’t compromise our walk with Jesus.
Here’s a seemingly innocent example of how wanting to belong can trip us up. Perhaps there’s a TV show that you hear people you know talking about. You’ve never seen it. But one night you’re flicking your remote and see it on. So you watch for a bit. You realize that its content is not something that supports your walk with Christ. (It’s probably an HBO show) You’re about to turn it off but then a voice says, ‘watch it because people will be talking about it tomorrow and you won’t be left out of the conversation if you watch it tonight.’ So you do. The next thing you know you’re watching it for months, sometimes years. All the while getting so many un-Christ-like messages in your head from this show. If it is network television with commercials, then even the commercials you see during this program are going to be more in line with the show’s content. If it’s a movie channel, all the plugs for their different shows will be about shows that coincide with the one you’re watching.
Friends, let’s not confuse being accepted with our overall desire to follow and be with the Lord. And remember one thing: it is written:

“As it is, you do not belong to the world….” (John 15:19)

So don’t worry about “belonging” all the time. You already belong to God Almighty! Reminding yourself of this will save you a lot of internal struggle.



5-We get caught up in a moment.

Emotions can get the best of us at any moment’s time. Especially since the current culture we live in does almost everything predicated on emotion or how we feel, usually in that one moment. We’re constantly berated with messages of ‘get it now’, ‘why wait?’, ‘if it feels good, do it’, ‘if it’s not hurting anyone, why not?’ These are all excuses to do whatever we want, whenever we want to, which usually stems from acting on emotion in the moment. People on TV and in the movies do things in an instant. They jump into bed in record time, quit their job without a second thought. And of course there are never any negative consequences that they incur. Everything works out beautifully in their lives. Yes, it usually does in TV or movie-land. But there’s absolutely no message of pause or restraint nowadays. And that’s how we can get caught up acting on emotion in a moment of weakness.
But friends, when we have this in the forefront of our mind we will be better at fighting the enemy in that moment and the moments that follow. Remember we may not be able to loosen his grip on the world but we can certainly loosen his grip on our lives. Let’s not live by emotion. Especially emotion in the moment.


6-The world we live in-LIES, LIES and MORE LIES

This world, this country, and especially this culture is getting less and less Christ-like everyday. I think we all know that but gang; it’s going to continue to get worse. I’m not being negative. I just want you to understand this so we can spend our time more in God’s word and furthermore with God’s people. The more Satan gets a grip on this world the more we have to remember this because the world will not remind us anymore. It used to be that current culture held to a certain level of responsibility and dignity. But those days are no more. In fact the current culture actually rejects that notion because they wrongly see it as someone judging them. (Wait until they get to the real judgment).

Now even our basic right of freedom is warped. The thinking is ‘If I want to do ‘x’ I should be allowed to it, and even our constitution should uphold it. But if I don’t like what you’re doing or saying, you shouldn’t do it or say it around me, and our constitution should uphold that too. Is that what the founding fathers had in mind when they made freedom of speech???? In the immortal words of Charlie Brown “Uggh!”

This is just another misconception of our world thanks to Satan. His lies are reaching
people like never before. People are listening to him and we must be aware of this fact. Understand he has one goal, to destroy the world and us. He’ll do whatever it takes to do that. Understand something friends. He is not called the “father of lies” because he sometimes lies. He always lies. Everything out of his mouth a lie. He is not even capable of telling the truth. It is written:

“When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”(John 8:45)

We must wake up from this vegetated state that we’ve been in. That alone will bring you closer to Jesus. It will lesson the enemy’s grip, maybe not on this world, but at least on you. And once you are out of his grip you can begin helping others!


Remember that first quote about the flesh and the spirit being opposed to each other? Here’s something that I often think about. Do you realize that the word LIVE spelled backwards is EVIL? And the word DEVIL backwards is LIVED? I wonder, is that a coincidence? Or maybe God has done this to remind us that we should not live for this world because this world has evils in it. Of course this world has many good things as well but at the very least we need to remember this.

Now the word DOG spelled backwards is GOD. I don’t think this is a new notion but let’s look closer at it. When we think of a dog, tell me what would you say is the number one word we think of? Probably the first thing we think of is loyal. Dogs are loyal to the day’s end, aren’t they? If you’ve ever had a dog you know they follow you around sometimes from room to room;they just want to be with you. Every time you walk in the door it’s a celebration whether you’ve been gone an hour or a whole day! They’re also forgiving. You’re 100% accepted to a dog. They are known for protecting both their masters and their homes, sometimes with fierce aggression. It’s literally part of their genetic make-up. And of course the dog’s most identifiable description: “Man’s best friend.” The dog it seems was made to just love us unconditionally. Is that a coincidence? I wonder. I think God has a sense of humor, don’t you?!

But how do some people treat their dogs? There are many cases of dog abuse and abandoned dogs are found daily. Sometimes they are even malnourished & in poor health. When we read or see stories of dog abuse or neglect, it’s actually hard to watch, most of the time we have to look away. Part of the reason is because the dog’s owner has a certain power of their dog. The dog relies on him or her to walk it, feed it and provide shelter for it. Unfortunately, not all dog owners do that. Because as much as the dog loves their owner, it doesn’t mean they’ll be loved back. That’s kind of the way some people treat God isn’t it? That power that the owner has over the dog is like our free will. God doesn’t make us worship or praise or follow him. What we do with that free will is tantamount to how we treat God isn’t it? Just something to think about….


7-Lead us not into temptation.

Another reason why it’s hard to walk the walk sometimes is because we don’t always pay attention to that still small voice. There are times that we’re stronger than other times. And it’s not really our job to know when that is exactly. But it is our responsibility to avoid a situation that could even lead us into temptation let alone saying no to it.

Consider the Lord’s Prayer. It says:
“Lead us not into temptation”

Another popular prayer is the Prayer of Jabez which says:
“And that you would keep me from evil.”

Notice this doesn’t say let me go to evil & then resist it. It doesn’t say let me allow evil to come to me and then resist it. It says essentially: don’t even bring me to evil, keep me away from it. We humans have a knack of walking toward evil even bringing ourselves face to face with it and then if we’re not able to resist it we feel badly about ourselves.

Guess what? God knew this. That’s why He says throughout the bible don’t even go there. Avoid it altogether! God knew we were human & that it would be very hard for us to resist. Remember that He made us. He knows what our strengths and weaknesses are because He put them there. Let’s listen to his instructions for our bodies! That’s why He says don’t even put yourself it evil’s ugly face! We don’t have to look temptation square in the eye every time because we simply aren’t strong enough to resist all the time. Of course there are times that you are going to be faced with it anyway. But we also need to do our part here.

If anyone is in any kind of recovery program, you know they tell you when you’re in recovery to not hang out at the places that you did either drugs or drinking or over-eating in whatever your addiction was. If you’re an alcoholic, avoid bars or even restaurants with big bar areas. They even warn you to stay away from friends that you did your addiction with. This is sound advice & I’ll bet the vast majority of people that are in successful recovery can attest to this wise way to stay on the good path. This is no different gang. Sure sometimes we can be strong enough to resist temptation but many times we can choose not even to face it. Does that mean we’re weak? Of course not. Friends, it means we’re being obedient


These are just a few of the ways that lead us down a path away from the Lord. When faced with these things and our humanness, it is hard to walk the walk at times.

But take heart, because it doesn’t have to be that way! Now that you know these, you’ll be armed to recognize them & change them. Gang, this is one of the most liberating things we can do for ourselves. It seems hard on the surface but if I can do it anyone can! Yes, we’re flesh & the flesh is weak. But don’t ever forget that we are created in God’s image. Jesus Christ is in us! Our flesh is weak but our spirit is powerful! Jesus said if we have faith not only can we do the things that he did but we can do more! It’s time to start trusting that this is true and living that way on a daily basis. Not just on the big things but all these little things that we’ve talked about above.


But how do we break out of this?

Well it’s not a big production, not a “systematic program” or even a crash course on obedience. Just the opposite. The answer is ‘one’. One day at a time. One decision at a time, sometimes one moment at a time.

If you overeat, it’s one meal at a time.
If you suffer verbal abuse from your spouse or family, it’s one snide remark at a time.
If you have problems at work with a person or project, it’s one encounter or one step at a time.
If you deal with confusion or indecisiveness like I did (and still do sometimes!) it’s one choice at a time.
If you’re raising children it’s literally one moment at a time.

You see the trend. It’s just taking each thing on, one at a time, and not worrying about the next time or situation.

But what happens if you don’t know what to do during one of those times?
If you get stuck, don’t ever say out loud or even just in your head “I can’t do this” or “I can’t do this anymore.” (remember #6-the enemy’s lies?) Replace it with “Can I do or handle this one thing right now? Usually your brain will answer “yes”. Then you say “OK. Lord, how do you want me to handle this? Ask the Lord right then and there and be open to any answer that comes to you as long as you know it is coming from the Lord. And then trust and do it. Act or handle it in a way that shows and testifies that you are a child of God. Because you are. That’s where you overcome. That’s where the rubber meets the road as they say. That’s where the power and strength comes to you that you didn’t know you had. You didn’t have it as long as you lived in the flesh. But in that moment you surrendered your flesh & let God give you His answer. That’s when your Spirit gets stronger and starts to awaken in you the power that God gave us and that Jesus gave His life for.

Then, after that moment, don’t start worrying about the next time(s). Don’t even give it a thought. If you start thinking or projecting about the future then enemy will get some ground in your mind. He’ll plant some seeds that we cannot let take root. That’s part of trusting God. He got you through this tough moment by leaning on Him. He’ll get you through the others. He’ll get you through any fire or storm that life throws at you. You need to trust him 1000%. Friends, he’s money in the bank. He’s your only “lock” in life as the betters’ say. And what a great thing to have a loving heavenly powerful Father as your lock!


Here are some comebacks that I pray will help you when offered something you know you don’t want to have or don’t want to do. They are just some simple things to say when you don’t know what to say in those moments. It is my prayer that they help you to turn a possible moment of weakness into a moment of victory and success! Amen!

Question: Would you like some “x”?

1-No, thank you. (no need to even explain yourself)
2-Thank you, no. (again, unless someone asks you further that’s all you need to say)
3-No thank, I’m satisfied. (it’s hard for someone to push you after you state that)
4-I don’t care for that (anymore) (once you say that it doesn’t make sense for the person to ask you again if you don’t like something)
5-I don’t feel like it right now (that should go over fine in our culture!)
6-If people are gossiping or badmouthing others & someone asks you for your opinion just say: I don’t really know that person or that situation 100% so I really couldn’t say.
(even if you do know the situation very well you can still say: I’m not that person so I couldn’t really say. Leave it at that; don’t say another word)
7-Sing a song of praise or hum a hymn even if it’s only in your head; try to really think about the words. This will give you instant inner strength and resolve!
8-Say a quote from the bible that can get you through the moment-either aloud or to yourself. Every time Christ was tempted in the desert He answered with “It is written …”. It worked for him!
9-No thanks, I have a headache/stomach ache/don’t feel well/am tired/don’t have the time/have to go. (this answers the question and gets you off the hook)
10-No thanks, I don’t have much interest in that (anymore). (it’s hard for someone to keep pushing something on you when you give an answer like this)
11-That’s not my cup of tea (anymore) (same as above)
12-I don’t care for that. Then turn it around and ask them a question about it for example: You (still) like that? But it must be in a gracious non-condemning way. (all your doing here is basically changing the subject; taking the pressure off of you)
13-Offer some friendly, Christ-like advice that’s non-condemning. You never know; this may literally be the first time that that person is hearing something like this. You have a chance to help bring them to change! To bring them a step towards Jesus!!!
14-Don’t even give them an answer. Just ask them a question; again making certain it is in a kind way; gentle, friendly earnest advice.
15-Pretend you didn’t hear them. Don’t even answer; just change the subject.
16-Pretend you didn’t hear them! Say nothing. They literally may not ask again.
17-Say a quick no thank you & then immediately change the subject. Asking a question to them is an excellent tool because it literally takes their mind away from the topic too. Have a question in mind. It doesn’t have to be anything important. It could be simple like: “Is it cold out?” Or “Where did you get that sweater?” (or fill in the blank with anything) or “What time is the game on tonight or what time is X happening? “ Or even simply “What time is it?”
I know these may sound silly or too simple but try them a few times & you’ll be amazed how easily they work!

Good luck & God Bless
TO HIM BE THE GLORY!